and an interesting turn of events...
jp came to visit for the weekend, which was awesome. n and i made drinks on fri (because his ex was being a nutter), and jp arrived just in time for a martini. then she and i stayed up talking cause that's what we do :) sat, was spent mostly watching HGTV. [have i mentioned yet that im obsessed with all things relating to home improvements/renovations?] we managed to peel ourselves off the couch to do some shopping (at one of my favorite stores) and get sushi (at kyodai in towson). the day was rounded out by mario kart and so you think you can dance. sun, i took jp to my favorite baltimore dinner (papermoon). anyone who comes to visit will be taken there. consider this your warning :)
after that, jp had to roll out so i spent the afternoon with my mom. DST had their annual jabberwock pagaent. it was my first debutante event, and i greatly enjoyed attending. im not really debutante material, but part of me wishes i'd gotten that sort of showcase when i was in high school... i spent the rest of the afternoon, watching football at the parents' (if by watching, i mean fell asleep because i was exhausted lol). when i got home, n was parked on the couch cleaning out the dvr :p i saw the end of grey's (it's nice to see izzy found her backbone, and bailey/kristina havent lost theirs). then we watched glee :D, the new desparate housewives and last week's project runway... [lol n we should start hosting gay night at n & m's to watch all these with cosmos and commentary]
before i went to bed, i checked my cell for messages... i dont pay much attention since the people who have my number keep in touch in a jillion other ways... i had a new txt from the ex
"i apologize for being irritable and ruining something with a great girl and i just wanted to tell u that"
it's been a month since he left. i accepted the situation, and decided to move forward. i dont know how he's been, but i worried. i think now, he's acknowledging what happened and moving on himself. i responded this morning
"thanks...dont worry im not expecting forgiveness or anything or for u to talk to me...just hope that ur happy"
"even w what happened between us, i continue to want the same for you. just remember that you have been loved and, therefore, can be loved again. goodbye"
i dont know why but i think i needed that. the last step, the last word, a final moment with the person i loved... a small part of me still wishes it hadnt played out this way... but the rest of me thinks it was inevitable. looking back on a relationship is difficult, but necessary. i will remember the highs and lows forever. they were there, and they all need to be acknowledged for what they were. at least this way, our parting wont be completely tainted with malice..